Throwback Thursday: Murder on the Cunux Express
1980's "Terror Train" is a weird, messy, delightful jewel of the early slashers.
A darkly charming piece of Canuxploitation that’s part slasher, part college sex comedy, and part Murder on the Orient Express. A group of prank-oriented college students throw one last fraternity party on New Year’s Eve aboard an excursion train, but the sins of their past start to catch up with them, as they are being picked off one after another by a mysterious killer seeking revenge for hazing gone wrong years prior.
Pretty straightforward, right? While the premise is ordinary; the finer details make it anything but. This was one of weirdest slashers I’ve ever seen; if it’s supposed to be New Year’s Eve, why is everyone is dressed in creepy costumes like it’s Halloween? Who the hell rents out a train for a college frat party, anyway? Copious amounts of alcohol on a constantly moving vehicle, c’mon, guys.
Strangest of all is a prominent magician played by David Copperfield. He’s too prominently featured to be a cameo, yet neither is he really a character. It almost feels like the filmmakers were given a filmed David Copperfield performance on a train and then decided to make a slasher movie around it. There is a lot of extended scenes of close-up magic. Sorry, but magic shows shot on film just aren’t that interesting. I think if you cut out all the Copperfield interludes the run time might be just an hour. There’s hint of Copperfield being a red herring for the killer, but the movie never really commits to the idea.
In fact, the movie doesn’t really commit to being a mystery. You pretty much know exactly who is behind the murders, but while weird as a premise, the costume party angle means the killer is always changing disguises, which is a neat idea. They should have dropped the whole mystery conceit and have the killer known from the start.
What I do love, and what saves the film, is the atmosphere. The party aesthetic of the interiors set against the snowy winter of exterior shots lends a great juxtaposition. There really is something uniquely cold about Canadian winers. I love how each car of the train is uniquely decorated and lighted in ways that don’t always make logical sense but are make it visually more interesting. It creates an uneasy and claustrophobic atmosphere that, thanks to the overblown lighting choices, and bizarre costumes everyone is wearing makes the train itself feel a bit otherworldly at times. This is where the movie wears its Giallo influences on its sleeve, and when it lets itself get weird with the visuals and atmosphere it starts to really sing.
Shout out to the train conductor played by Ben Johnson, who seems surprisingly laid back about kids getting butchered on his train. Jamie Lee Curtis plays Alana, the only one who feels any guilt about sending one of their classmates to the psyche ward. They lend the proceedings some legitimacy, while the rest of the cast are local actors who, no offense, are very obviously in their 30’s, but that’s also part of the charm.
If you do decide to give a whirl, make sure you seek out the 1980 version and NOT the remake, which I got 10 minutes into before having to turn it off. Even the worst 80’s slasher is better than most mediocre horror movies made today.